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Are you a Mommy Martyr?

by Heather Chauvin

Have you ever heard of a Mommy Martyr?

You know those moms who complain about everything. Life is horrible and no one will ever understand. They tend to have a whole lot of excuses, and never seem to have any fun.

Please don’t be a mommy martyr. I know it’s easy to use your kids as excuses for why you can’t do something, but is that the truth?

Is it your kids holding you back, or an old belief system getting in the way?

One of my all time favorite quotes is by Henry Ford, and he said “Whether you think you can or you can’t you’re right.”

  • If you truly believe something CAN’T be done, it won’t.
  • If you have convinced yourself that you will never repair the relationship with your child, you’re right.
  • If you have convinced yourself that you have to struggle to the point of exhaustion and misery, then you are also right.

BUT…

  • Action is the best way to shift your limiting beliefs.
  • If you make a conscious decision and take action to repair the relationship with your child, you will!
  • If you take a look at your life and start integrating a plan to feel more ease and increase you energy, you will!

Currently we live in a “can’t culture,” with an addiction to complaining. It’s a learnt behaviour. Something we’ve picked up from our parents and the generations before them.

This hopelessness comes from being overworked, burnt out and stressed out. No wonder we have some of the highest children’s mental health stats in all developed countries.

The truth is… you’ve subscribed to a shitty way of thinking (let’s just be honest). You’ve subscribed to an inappropriate definition of motherhood. Giving all of yourself, everything you have, to your kids and everyone else around you, leaving yourself absolutely empty.

Would you take your car on a road trip without any gas? Then why do you do this in your own life?

It’s time to redefine what motherhood really means.

Over the next 3 articles, I’ll be diving into this Mommy Martryr Syndrome to show you how to take care of yourself while raising amazing kids.

Let’s start with showing up for your own life.

It’s a practice. A conscious decision. Yes, there may be some resistance along the way… but boy, the other side is so sweet and amazing.

Why is it important?

You’re doing this to be a role model for your kids. You are their definition. You are their greatest teacher. Their inner voice.

You cannot expect ANYthing from your children if you’re not willing to do it yourself.

When we decide to show up fully for ourselves and our children there are 3 key areas that need to be looked at first.

1) Emotional control -
You can think of this as reaction vs a conscious decision.

Typically, we react. We yell because we want to be ‘heard’ and want the behavior to stop. This tactic actually produces fear within the child and changes their brain chemistry as well.

When we take a step back and gain control over our own emotional response we approach the situation in a more loving and compassionate manner. Which = less yelling, greater relationships and closer connection.

If you can calm yourself down and let go of your anger, you can teach your children to do the same. {tweet it}

2) Awareness around resistance and fear -
Ultimately, as parents, we want our children to be happy and successful in their lives. But what we sometimes forget is teaching our children the importance of resistance and fear.

Resistance wants to keep us safe and in our comfort zones.
Fear is a natural response to a mentally stressful situation (a new experience).

When you become aware of and learn from your own resistance and fears as parents, you can teach your children how to successfully work through their own.

3) Living full, passionate lives -
I witness the lack of this all the time in children and see parents at their wits-end to get them motivated.

As cultures become more tech savvy and fast paced, we lose sight of what is really important and find ourselves in auto-pilot, just waiting…

But the truth is… when you come from a place of feeling completely grounded, organized and accepting, you begin to transmit these feelings outward. Your world changes… and so do your children (all for the better).

To me, it’s all about taking daily inspired action. Living with energy, passion, and purpose. So your kids can grow up into that kind of being — with purpose and passion. To become the greatest person they can be in their own lives. You show them the possibility for their future.

Let me show you how.

I’ve rearranged my schedule to take on a handful of passionate, determined women willing and ready to do the work, to fight for their happiness and help their children overcome their own personal struggles.

Apply Here

(After your application is filled out, we will contact you for an enrollment interview, to see if we are a right fit.)

If you’ve been waiting for a miracle… this might be it!

With love,

heatherchauvin

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Heather Chauvin is a mental health and self-esteem advocate who has made it her mission to enhance the lives of women and children through conscious living. Heather has a Bachelor of Social Worker Degree and wide variety of continuing education certification in the mental health and holistic sector. Heather also carries a decade of experience working with many diverse populations locally and abroad. Heather leads dynamic training programs that teach both adults and children to succeed in life and accomplish anything they put their minds to. Her unique life experience and professional trainings gives Heather a one-of-a kind approach to personal growth and development.

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